I need a strategy for my trip to South America. I need a Statement of Intent and Key Performance Indicators.

There’s many things I want to do – explore Macchu Picchu and other lost Inca things, penetrate to the heart of the Amazon, bond with local cultures, do voluntary work, write lots of travel journalism and other stuff. But the bottom line is that I don’t end up – read this, Simon Bidwell, in six months time! – stuck drinking tequila in a backpackers bar in Cuzco with a bunch of alcoholic Danes, pissed because some mildly interesting Canadian girl has rebuffed my timorous advances. Therefore I’m setting the Terms of Reference now, and I’ve decided that language immersion and improvement will be the minimum contracted requirements for my travels:
Target 1: take my Spanish to the next level
Target 2: get some Portuguese going

Actually, the Portuguese is optional and secondary. The absolute minimum I should expect from a year or so in Latinoamerica is * much better Spanish * This will require effort, but – that’s not too much to ask, is it?!